I’m all ‘booked in’, the phrase used by the midwives here to get you into the system and under the care of the midwife team. An hour long visit by the midwife covered all my medical history and the pregnancies and births so far.
‘Harry was forceps, William was an emergency C-section and although Ben’s was the most frightening because it was all going wrong, I was in theatre with the surgical team standing leaning against the walls and he was born not breathing, his was the only delivery that counts as normal because there was no assistance, apart from the consultant turning his head manually in the canal,’ I explain breezily to the midwife.
I stop. Was that right? Was there a ventouse? Or forceps? I think carefully. I can remember the moments in theatre like yesterday but I can’t remember the actual delivery.
What’s the matter with me? This was my baby, for God’s sake! How can I not remember?
I think for several minutes. They were in a hurry because of all the problems but I’m certain there was no assisted delivery. I sit back.
‘Are you sure?’ asks Sarah, ‘because if there was a problem it could affect how the consultant feels about attempting a normal delivery this time.’
So I spend several minutes searching the study until I find Ben’s red (medical) book. There it is: Delivery – forceps.
I don’t know which is more worrying. The fact that I have no brain left. Or that I am clearly a crap mother.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
Don’t worry – I can’t remember much about either of my two boys’ births now and they weren’t THAT long ago and were fairly monumental events. Well apart from the fact that they arrived of course. I think your brain blanks out most of it to protect you
I can’t imagine forgetting that one of my children was forceps (sorry!) but I agree with Pewari that your brain blanks out most of the labour experience. Otherwise we’d never go through it more than once.
Um, I’m here to attest that once you have more than 2, all the birthing details run together. It’s our reward for birthing so many babies! Don’t sweat the small stuff.
I’m also here to offer nothing but positive thoughts for you and your upcoming birth experience, it’s going to be great.
Yes, I agree with Pewari and Eva that the in-built forgetting is one of the best things about childbirth. And Pam, thank you for your thoughts (although to be honest I’m trying very hard not to think about the next one’s arrival!).
It is absolutely true that you are not meant to remember all that stuff. I mean, honestly, how would the species have survived if all us mothers could clearly recall all the details of our deliveries? I pushed for four hours while delivering my first son, but I’ve needed my husband and sister to remind me of that fact. If it had been so well embedded in my own mind, I never would have had the girls, I’m sure. I do have a friend who seems to remember every second of her son’s delivery which ended with a c-section after many hours of labor and she’s only got one child and is absolutely commited to never having another, so there you go.
My third delivery was the “easiest”, but then I was still in labor for 25 hours. Or maybe it was 48. I’ll have to check in with my husband. Oh, and I’ll send you some “hypnobirthing” info. if you don’t mind…I know it sounds cheesy, but I think it really worked for me, seeing as how I pushed for four hours and my head did not explode!
Thanks Kristen, that would be great. I considered hypnotherapy to get me through this morning sickness but I got pregnant before I had a chance to look into it and then I was too unwell to do anything about it.
If you click on the Contact link in the sidebar there is a form which you can fill in which comes straight to my email inbox (I got so inundated with spam after publishing my email on my last site that I opted for this arrangement this time.)